Archive for Pain of Life

Midnight’s Caress

Posted in From a Melancholic Soul, Through the Passage of Time with tags , , , , , , , , on October 17, 2012 by mistressofpoetry

Sands shift slowly in worlds which collide
The heaven which I sought now falls beyond my reach
As the seasons unfold in chaos

My eyes seek the solitude of dreams
For they are the only breath that is left in me
If but for a moment I could breathe
And yet I long for them as a child longs for its mother
Desecration of warmth
Violation of sanctuary
The seas stir against me
And I fall along the path which I alone walked many times

My moon, which kisses the horizon on her way to eternity
She sings softly the gift of respite
However brevid, it soothes my heart for the night
And I dream again

Morning rises to meet the lover’s eyes
So sweetly, they join in a dance which I know not
I hear them in the footsteps of my soul
The laughter, I despise
An embrace that leaves me in want
Were it not for the solemn thoughts within midnight’s caress
I would be lost whole in emptiness eternal
Yet a darker heaven is seen more clearly
In the shadow of my reflective stare.

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Patterns on the Mire

Posted in Goodbye, Loss, Remembrance, The Pain of Life, Through the Passage of Time with tags , , , , , , , , , on July 2, 2012 by mistressofpoetry

 

Rain falls softly on my field of remembrance
Years spent in the evening gloom
As the breeze breaks through my song
And I recall the echoes of a life long past

In truth, it was but a memory’s glance at salvation
For all it was worth
I never saw a smile which did not pierce my heart
With agony
With judgement
With lost hope which dared not lift its face

My confessions reach beyond the veil I drew in sorrow
Sorrow for the many truths which now lie in dust and mourning
Forgotten and torn for vultures to devour
As my soul dies gently in dreams which know no end

A heart painted black by pain, which even now you hide
An empty wish spoken to the bearer of mine eyes
But vision fell deep upon the stains you still carry
And I looked hard into your soul, and saw no tears
Only blind rage coursed through the brush you held
As I ran into the wilderness of remorse

There, behind all the laughter
Falling from each whisper of my spirit’s breath
Lay a pain which cannot find retreat
For there is no morning to embrace the dew
And no night for my setting sun
Not even a teardrop to dine upon the soil

Do not wonder at the reason
When the bells toll upon my grave
Do not dare to shed your tears
For it was you who placed me beneath the stone

The garden grows tall with the recollection
That only the ghosts are willing to speak
The rust and ruin of forgotten yesterdays
Self-evidence within the patterns on the mire
As my silent novel fearfully repeats
And marks but one last word upon a fading memory
Why?

The Pearl

Posted in From a Melancholic Soul, Perseverance, The Pain of Life, Through the Passage of Time with tags , , , , , , , on February 25, 2012 by mistressofpoetry

Freedom_Is_A_Long_Way_Away_by Arielle Carroll

 

Funeral of my soul
I have brought forth the chalice for thy grief
To fill with tears
Emotions fallen on deaf hearts and blind greed
They darken with each breath
And in hatred, seethe the darkest black of my broken star
Wishes never spoken

Mirrored in nightmares
I could throw myself from my chariot
Riding low upon the fields
Tangled in a web of chaotic guilt
There is no escape for me
No angel to hearken the nights filled with weeping
And no hand to wipe away the tears

Why can I not break?
Why must I remain in these bloodstained halls
On paths which I wish to forget?
Death holds no promise
Neither the morn
For I have besought all pleasure and pain
Only to hold this one quiescent pearl of being.

My gaze cannot pierce its treasure
Nor can my thoughts behold it’s meaning
For so long I have been alone
Years filled with the curse of sorrow’s temptation
So few have seen the unknown depths
But then so few have dared to look
As I held onto this one small gift which fell from within

The gods have betrayed a fool
My fate in this labyrinth of whispered regret
I am a pauper’s forbidden bounty
Hidden in the silence of the bedchamber wall
Beauty which could not foresee a dream of light
Wishing never to be gazed upon again
Mourning these forsaken memories, in dust.

Desert Prodigal

Posted in From a Melancholic Soul, Passion and Pain, Perseverance, The Pain of Life, Through the Passage of Time with tags , , , , , , , , , on September 4, 2011 by mistressofpoetry

Falling forever, it seems like nothing has changed
A runaway in the desert, following streams that led me astray
Hours turn to years of loneliness under a blinding sun
And all I can say for my bitterness is that I still feel

Thirsty and angered at all that life has repaid
Hatred and lust toward my only guiding star
As the sand takes my vision away
And hides my tears deep in the morrow of pain

Pleasure will scorch me with flames that bear loneliness
Twisted as life has become, those flames have become my smile
As many a torment has caressed my cheek
And it is all that I understand

Spun in the threads of a storm for so long
I can’t remember the last face to greet me
Dry desert trails this prodigal has traced
To simply find a friend

Fear for the angels who come to take my broken spirit away
Nothing more to mourn for, and nothing left of me
As phantoms embrace my lost and dying heart
To lead me once more to grace

In that final, whispered dream of a thought
As my eyes clear away the debris of a thousand wars
The stream reappears from the flow of my heart
And the burden lay before me in the form of rain

Blood mixed with water far too long held back
An oasis springs forth in the echoes of release
As chains of emotion bound by Hell’s angry eyes
Fall from tattered wings… and scream

The journey falls upward in a furious storm
As the vultures reveal the decay
Had not I fallen, I’d never have lived
Beauty was the desert in my fallen eyes
Blinded and opened by pain… to set me free…

Eternal_Slave_of_Fear_by_Arielle Carroll

In The Fields

Posted in Fantasy, For the Dreamer, For the Warrior, From a Melancholic Soul, Perseverance, Through the Passage of Time with tags , , , , , , , on August 28, 2011 by mistressofpoetry

I have slowly found my faith in the sands that once buried the saint of fire
For the insects have betrayed themselves in the wealth of carrion
I am no more their slave… not for nothing.
I will fear nothing; clarity becomes the storm that will free my soul
And the sun will forget my face
As twilight becomes the robe of my desire

Silence beckons the steel chaos within, and I feel the chains
My voice is a thunder
Which for far too long has remained in the depths
And I will pour from this lonely shadow as a gale
May the winds find the echo of a lost spirit who has found her wings
And lay the road once more that I trod so long ago

The lady of winter shall shed her tears,
As summer’s flower shall dream its dreams upon the night
For the seas of forever shall not be forgotten by my eyes
They behold the constant flow of my passage throughout,
Where burden shall rescind to the sky
In the brevity that is my sullen wake

My soul shall invoke the power of these tears
For I have shed them in the dew and in the tempest which brought the pain
The hourglass has brought screams of betrayal and sighs of delight
Wherewith I have pounded my fists upon the ash
But upon this fire, I shall awaken my fate,
And burn in the fields of a defiant strength

Hate Me

Posted in From a Melancholic Soul, Perseverance, The Pain of Life, Through the Passage of Time with tags , , , , , , on August 13, 2011 by mistressofpoetry

Blackened shards of hatred pierce my soul, as you tear apart my life.
Why can’t you love me; why am I so disgusting to you?
The tears of rage can flood away my sight, but they cannot take away my pain,
For I am alone, in a crowded room filled with unknown faces that I cannot trust.
Familiarity of the past is now become as strange to me as alien eyes,
Kissing lies, fairytales of understanding, vicious obliterations that rip apart my spirit wings,
You will all fall at the foot of revelation, blinded eyes forced apart,
“SEE ME AS I AM!!!”

I am the same as I was, only I have faced my fear, I have found who I am,
But who I am is a threat to your pitiful outlook.
The rose has it’s thorns, but it is still a rose, as beautiful as ever,
But you judge the rose by its thorns,
You judge me, and you hate me, and I care not.

My tears have no place in your eyes, for you refuse to see them.
You refuse to see my pain, how it cuts me till it bleeds.
I drown in heavy floods of rage, bury myself in a blanket of death.
I no longer know you; you have turned your back, and I weep bitterly,
Because I remember the times of my decieved youth,
When the sun shone brightly on blinded eyes;
But now, I see the crystal truth, I become who I truly was meant to be,
And you hate me for it.

The art of my soul sings great melodies of beautiful tears,
But the raven is unacceptable, for she paints in black.
The song is melancholy, but it is no less beautiful than the sun-laced sky.
I will see you in the days of your lonliness, when you have forgotten me;
But my face will glow with truth, for I accepted what you could not…

A Stranger Behind These Eyes

Posted in From a Melancholic Soul, Loss, The Pain of Life with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on July 8, 2011 by mistressofpoetry

A stranger, I wander alone inside;
For all that I have known, I do not know who stares behind these eyes.
I no longer belong in this place of scowling faces.

Hatred have I recieved for every breath I take,
Rejection has adorned my soul in black;
For it was painted as the shadow in which I roam.

My flesh, so cold and lonely,
For all who would dare to touch me are just as I,
And I find this is most beloved of my mournful soul–to find understanding.

These lost spirits who, abandoned, have found peace within the dark–
These are my true companions
For they know the structure of the intricate dreams that I dream.

The tears escape my eyes,
Which, burning with fatigue and desecrated visions, have sought the end so many times,
But within, still, remains the ponderings of a suffocating struggle to be free.

I question each sound which reverberates within this mind of illusory departure.
To find emotion once more; to find the dreamer which lurks inside these dying halls.
My labrynth is filled with deadly passages, consumed with madness and fear.

I have journeyed far, over the ocean of a time which feeds upon a haggard battlefield,
As the obelisk-like formations resonate the terrifying silence,
For these ancient monoliths have fallen, and I wish not to set foot upon that dread place.

The seasons of waking nightmares have been left behind,
But this is a place that I no longer know, and I am the stranger here.
All eyes are upon my transparent form, and I am become one of the ghosts in this place.

My existence is a perilous void, seeking substance within,
But it is my true companions which have held me fast in the sweat of my disease.
When my wanderings subside, it is their eyes which I will long to see–
Love beyond love, sight beyond vision, trust beyond that of life and death;
And I will fear no more…